I still exist

Been awhile.
I am sick...so, that's that.
On top of excruciating pain from the main...whatever it is...I'm scared to go to the Doc...

I have an ear infection right now.

bleh

Anyways, I have also been drawing...A LOT.
Been trying to learn a new medium....colored pencil.
Drawing really is about seeing.
My own personal proof?
The one subject I draw better than any...my Mother.
Perhaps because except for a short period of time here and there,
my Mom and I have shared a residence all my life.
Including my adult life.
I see my Mother constantly...every tiny nuance of her
face is etched into my mind.
My best subjects after her...my Father, then my children,
then my cat....then Bill.
All individuals that I see constantly.
I draw the cat better than the husband because the
cat is always at my side.
I see him constantly.
Husband is running errands for wife all day...
so I only have him by my side at night.
Cat does not appreciate this intruder to our
cat /woman love fests...eiw..that
didn't sound right.
Why isn't my sis among the list of people I can draw with
my eyes closed?
I suppose because during the time we lived together and
saw one another every day, she was a child and her face
changed a lot as she matured...then she married early.
When I draw something unfamiliar, I look like a total idiot.
I sit and stare at it intently.
I turn it around and around or walk around all sides that are
available to walk around.
I touch it with my eyes, milimeter by milimeter...I find the lines,
then I take off my glasses...you people who can see well, can just squint.
When I take off my glasses, I then see dark and light. ( values )
If I am faced with a difficult perspective, I work it by site not
formula, and make sketches as I do this looking in order to get it how I see it.
Perspective is my weak point..so that extra step is needed...otherwise,
I do all my intent staring, and then I start drawing...usually a line
drawing. When I finish my line drawing...on cheap paper..I trace it.
Then I can use that as a template in case I screw up and need to start over.
I also use this template several times during planning.

From there I work out things like composition, and color
through thumbnail drawings.
When I have the compositon and color how I want it, I make a test run.
I transfer the finished compositon onto a cheap peice of paper, using
any elements from tracing paper that were drawn seperately...or I redraw
them free hand if size or angle has changed.
I then transfer the finished composition to another sheet of cheap paper,
and color it.
this is fast coloring to make sure the ideas in my
thumbnail will work out in a full sized drawing.
This also insure the VALUES are good...and if this is
going to be a graphite drawing...that's very important.
Color isn't even a factor in that case.
Values are the MOST important aspect of color and light that
there is...understand it and understand it well.
If I am going to use colored pencil as the final paint
medium then I write down which pencils I used for my
test painting/drawing.
If I am going to use graphite I write down what pencils
I used, and have my visual map all ready.
I then transfer the compostion/linework yet again
to my final surface.
Um...sometimes that is again cheap paper if this entire
thing is only practice.
I do a lot of things using this entire process that I never
intent to show anyone, but the kitty.
He loves everything I do.
This entire process is also used for paintings using watercolor, acrylics, or
oils...for any art work except for digital.
I do some things differently in with digital painting.

A word about family, and pets who want to sit with you as you draw.
Or in the case of my cat..ON the drawing..
Get a drawing board if you can.
For humans it gives people the non- verbal message that I am serious here..
I'm not playing around with pencils and paint. ( well..ok..I am but..)
I am working.
I have to constantly remind my humans that this is for money.
But even if it isn't for money in your case...
drawing and painting take thought, and planning, and concentration.
You are serious about what you are doing even if you do enjoy it.
Others need to respect that.
A drawing table says to others..."Hey..I'm working here!"
As for the cat..if he tries to sit on my tilted drawing table..
well..he slides right off!
Another message to others that you are serious...establish
a space that is for art work only.
Openly and blatantly call it your studio...even if it's just
a small space behind your sofa.
Real artists have studios in most peoples minds.
This is good for the new artist who struggles with the
concept and question of "Am I really an artist."
We all go through that period of wondering if we deserve to join the ranks
of those who are called artist. We blush when others call us that one day..
and many even deny it.
My way of knowing if one is truly an artist?
If you decide you are...then you are.
But having a space dedicated to art helps one with that decision.
It also helps those around them see that decision.

And a painting too!

It's Kes from Star Trek Voyager.

Digital painting using real media principles.

I am having issues from working between moniters...on this one there is too much orange...I am not seeing that on the montiter I painted it on. It's irritating and like the issue with the scans in the last entry...makes me feel powerless.

new drawings

really just practice....except for the bones...that's a not so much practice as a doodle thingy. The pic of the girl is my daughter Donna...it was extremely fast. If you have kids then you have an idea of how much they move...and just how fast the sketch was.

All are traditional media..mostly pencil and/or graphitints ( basically ...pencil, but a lightly tint, water soluable type.)

All done in the last week...longest took about 2 hours?

Terrible scans.

What bugs me about digital artists...

I am not an art snob.
I love all kinds of art.
But a few things bother me about the "art world" in general...
and digital art, specifically.
When I first discovered programs like Photoshop and
PaintshopPro...I played with all the doodads.
It was beyond amusing to make photos of myself look like
metal or leather with the click of the mouse.
It was neato to make kalaidoscopic patterns with a similar
click or two.

Then I discovered you could actually make a mark...your own
mark...using a digital paintbrush.
Slowly, I would use a mouse to make drawings and paints.
I could even enhance them with grain, or changing color.



This pic is a drawing.
It was disqualified from a competition because it was
believed to be a photo...or at least that some trickery
was involved. Although the competition had a digital
art catagory...they didn't understand digital art very
well. They thought I had submitted a photomanipulation...
which they understood...and didn't allow.
I did use a grain filter...but other than that I used
PaintshopPro's round paintbrush, and smudge tools...
and nothing else. It is the equivalent...using a pencil and
a smudge stick. I didn't trace anything, I didn't
manipulate a photo. I used a reference photo to
LOOK at, but did not use any kind of trickery...
and this was before I had a graphics tablet.
My point.
I can draw.
I have honest artistic skill.
No..not the best skill, but I do have some.

So, can you guess what is bothering me?

I'm going to make people angry...
I will appologise now.

But I don't get all these people who "exhibit widely",
win "numerous awards", even judge competitons...

and all they do is run filters!

Or they do what is actually photo manipulations.

And most call themselves digital painters.

Shouldn't something have been painted,
before calling a piece a painting?

I am not saying that anyone or
any style is or is not art or an artist.
I am saying that running a
filter isn't painting.

I will furthur venture to say that until people stop
doing this, those who are anti-digital and think that
all digital art is "generated" , and that digital art is simply
not real art...will keep thinking these things.
How can they help it when digital artists themselves seem so confused,
about what they are doing?
I leave you with a digital...painting.
I made those marks.
I guided a stylus to paint them, and formed them into
a picture of a girl.

Wise words from Ms Japel

I like her.
She has ...something.
She's just one of those people whom you can look at in a
photograph, even and know...she's special.
I was reading an interview with Stefani Japel of
Glampyre knits, and this part really caught my eye.

"Nat: Are there any tips you can share about running a craft business?

Stefanie: I'm still learning about the whole business end of
things, so don't listen to any advice from me. But here are
some things that I do:
Don't pay too much attention to what other people are doing.
Keep to your own aesthetic and you'll stay original. The second
you decide to consciously directly compete with what someone
else is doing is the second you lose the freshness of your own ideas.
I read blogs, and there are a few shop sites I check every so often...
but maybe because I'm so busy, I live in a bubble. I don't have time
to pay too much attention to other craft businesses.

Don't take yourself too seriously. I think that one big mistake
people make is to think of themselves as experts...I don't know.
Craft is what you do because you love it. When you start to put
all that pressure on yourself...ideas are harder and harder to come by.
Let things just flow.

Constantly sketch. Draw every single permutation of every
idea that you have.

Save your receipts and organize them. Taxes suck.

Stay friendly. I learn so much from people who are in this business.
I see every relationship as something to learn from. The most annoying
customer can really give you insight into the minute things that could
be changed to either make the site more navigable, or the pattern more
easy to read. Some people even write just because they're lonely...not
because they really have a problem with you or your work...just treat
everyone with respect, and you'll be respected."

Sometimes it is the most simple actions that mean the most. And while she
is talking about crafts and knitting, I think the same advice should be taken by
fine artists too.
That ol "act like a rock start, cold shoulder the fans,let them know you are a superior
being " act has got to go.
I have seen it fail a number of times now, for a number of people.
Yeah...the part about staying nice REALLY caught my attention.

gratification

painting more or less
"flopped" everywhere I showed it.
Maybe people think parents are
being self indulgent when they
paint their children.
It's my daughter Donna.
Anyways...they liked it over at
artwanted.com.
That's nice.

Yanno..I am sorry about griping about Mom so much.
But sometimes, I need to vent.
The woman sits and talks for 30 minutes straight
about how backed up she is.
Asks if I will give her an enema...
to which I replied that there is a reason that
I didn't chose medical care with humans. ( I used to
be a vet tech.)
But she wouldn't be in this
shape if she didn't eat about 4 times more than
she should at each meal.
I mean...she uses a mixing bowl for a cereal bowl!
She complains about reflux when she eats...well duh...
She is 4'11".
You put that amount of food into such a
short torso/stomach...you run out of space.
But then she has the nerve to harass
my chidren every time they eat a piece of candy.
She was even trying to force them
to watch some talk show with a severly obese
child...all the while giving lectures and dire warnings...
AND SHE HAD A BOWL OF ONE OF HER MEGABOWLS
OF CEREAL AT THE TIME!
And the cereal is an example.
We all use smallish plates from my set of dishes.
She uses the giant dinner plate and fills it up.
She fills it up even if I haven't had a chance to eat.
So, sometimes...I don't even get to eat dinner.
You see why I needed to vent?

doom and gloom-aboom,boom,boom

I have been Ms Negative Pants lately, eh?

But really, I'm a generally happy person.
I suppose that's because I get it out.

But I admit..this last year has been a very tough one...

sigh I even stopped painting.

I also stopped getting things out in other ways...
that is until I would just explode.

But I have started painting again...and everything seems to be
much more balanced.

I had stopped painting for ten years before...for various reasons.
And when I HAD to start again, I mean I NEEDED to paint.
I was getting a divorce.
But when I decided to start again, I wasn't sure that I could.
Then I painted this flower.
I think it's ok.

One stop creation

http://www.tinkertinker.com/

I have mentioned my Rebecca many a time.

She is a special girl...and I'm 
not just saying that because 
I am her Mom.
She has a very high IQ, and a very 
creative and dynamic personality.
She is a force of nature.
She's big, smart, able and 
ready.
But Lord help you if she
 isn't willing.
Or if she wants YOU to be 
willing when you are not.
She is passionate...and she
 is stubborn.
She has the soul of an artist, 
the mind of a brain surgeon,
and the heart of a poet.
She is both an idea girl..and 
she can plan AND she 
can follow through.
Most people really only 
excell at one of those areas. 

I don't brag on her like this very often.
But it's a bit relevant.
I secretly had this idea
for a place like I linked to
at the start of this post.
And she also had the same idea.
We just sort of blurted it
all out the other day
while we were working in
my studio.
Becca often chooses to
make sketches
of her paintings and ideas
before she does the final product..so
she is in there with me alot.
The room is set up for art and exploration.

We both decided we wanted
to make a place
where others can come
and create too.
Her idea is to call
it "The Make Place"


I NEED this..and so does she.
While she can always find
a way to occupy that
1000 mile an hour brain of hers,
she needs a focus.
Fortunately she has
sticktoitness...always has.
So oddly I don't worry much
about embarking on a business venture
with my 6 year old daughter.

This town also needs this place.

What is offered to older children
and young/mid aged
adults in the way of artistic exploration
in Westerville is pathetic.
Also what is offered as a means for artists
to display their work just isn't enough.
We have a sweet little gallery uptown....
but it isn't large enough...
and I feel the pricing is a bit
prohibitive for those
who have never shown their work before.
In addition to that all space is rented.
Artists are never featured based upon
artistic innovation or skill.
I think a "people's" gallery, as well
as a featured
artists gallery would be the berries.

I'll ask Becca what she thinks.

Or maybe not..she is still under the
impression that I am
mentor material.
But while I have a pretty good brain of my own,
I fully expect her to surpass me..

Heck, she'll be taller than me by
the time she's 8!
4'5" already!( maybe more since
I noticed her pants
looking like floods this morning)

And please...do not for one moment
think that this post undervalues Donna.

Donna is a whole different story...
whew..is she ever.
All of the above characteristics is slanted
quite differently when the child is
extremely introverted....
and when she is made of pure wonder.
My daughters are like a coin whose
one side is science, and
the physical. And whose other side is
magic and the ethereal.

PICS..for a change.

This is a painting which I thought was done..but
when I looked at the photo, I noticed that large
white splotch...which is far more noticable in
photos, than in real life. But online, it's photos
that count. So I need to fix that white splotch on
the leaf on the tree in the front. Painting is oil and
oil pastel on paper...and very darned big, for paper.




Then we have some yarn that I got from a
thrift store sweater. Bill and I are sharing it.
That's his swatch for the hat he is making for me.
I love my husband.





And while we are talking of spouses who make
hats...this is Bill's balaclava, which I made.
He got to test it out today..our first real snow this year.
He says it is almost TOO warm.
Yay.
Again..no pattern.





I also made myself a scarf and ...hmmm.it's kind
of like a hat with no top.
I didnt have enough yarn for a hat, but this
works very well. The yarn is a beautiful
wool/mohair/nylon mix...
I am VERY tempted to buy more.
Not appologising for the paint shirt, nor
for the blurry pic, nor for the mean face I'm making,
nor for being fat.

Also I am not appologising for the mess in the next photos.









This is large rug that I made from 6 smaller ones.
It goes in that room perfectly.( my family room)
Mom seems to think that we need doilies in
that very ...not-a-doily kind of room.
I have made a chair set that DOES match...
I just need to finish it up.
And yes..the wall not pictured is blue.
And yes..there is art all over it.

100 reasons...a challenge for artists.

100 REASONS CHALLENGE



The point of this challenge is to test and
improve your skills...



THE RULES:





1) Make 100 works of art, with each having
a theme as listed below. Each should have
ONE and only ONE theme to it.



2) No time limit, so have fun!



3) The art should be of your own ability,
so whatever medium you are most familiar
and comfortable with is allowed. Artwork must
be original and created by you, the participant.
Photomanipulations are fine, but DO CREDIT the stock
you use! Your work can be anything from crap
to great master pieces. Just have fun with it.



4) The list below is to be placed somewhere
in your or website for others to see that:

A) You are in the challenge.

B) What you have completed.



5) Make sure to update this list and check off
what is done and make a link to work as it is
submitted to your gallery.



6) In the comments for your artwork add
a note stating that it is
part of the "100 REASONS CHALLENGE" list and
state which ONE theme it is.



7) Now the good part... CHALLENGE YOUR FRIENDS!



THE LIST





1. Introduction

2. Love

3. Light

4. Dark

5. Seeking Solace

6. Break Away

7. Heaven

8. Innocence

9. Drive

10. Breathe Again

11. Memory

12. Insanity

13. Misfortune

14.Smile

15. Silence

16. Questioning

17. Blood

18.Rainbow

19. Gray

20. Fortitude

21. Vacation

22. Mother Nature

23. Cat

24. No Time

25. Trouble Lurking

26. Tears

27.Foreign

28.Sorrow

29.Happiness

30. Under the Rain

31. Flowers

32. Night

33. Expectations

34. Stars

35. Hold My Hand

36. Precious Treasure

37. Eyes

38. Abandoned

39. Dreams

40. Rated

41. Teamwork

42. Standing Still

43. Dying

44. Two Roads

45. Illusion

46. Family

47. Creation

48.Childhood

49. Stripes

50. Breaking the Rules

51. Sport

52. Deep in Thought

53. Keeping a Secret

54. Tower

55. Waiting

56. Danger Ahead

57. Sacrifice

58. Kick in the Head

59. No Way Out

60.Rejection

61. Fairy Tale

62. Magic

63. Do Not Disturb

64.Multitasking

65.Horror

66.Traps

67. Playing the Melody

68. Hero

69. Annoyance

70. 67%

71. Obsession

72. Mischief Managed

73. I Can't

74. Are You Challenging Me?

75.Mirror

76. Broken Pieces

77. Test

78. Drink

79.Starvation

80.Words

81. Pen and Paper

82. Can You Hear Me?

83. Heal

84. Out Cold

85. Spiral

86. Seeing Red

87. Food

88. Pain

89. Through the Fire

90. Triangle

91.Drowning

92. All That I Have

93. Give Up

94. Last Hope

95. Advertisement

96. In the Storm

97. Safety First

98. Puzzle

99.Solitude

100. Relaxation



Could any of these be translated through
knitting...or some other more tactile and 3 dimensional mediums?

I have known about this challenge for some
time...I only now have the sudden urge to do it.
As for painting..I may go weeks with no ideas...then
full paintings appear in my head all at once...and in
multitudes!

This was originally found on a deviantart journal...I
don't recall who the journal belonged to.
 

trees?

I get freakin' weird ideas sometimes.

I wanna make big white papier mache trees.
Ones with no leaves.

I wouldn't mind making them water proof 
and putting glitter on them, etc..and decorating
 them with snow flakes and using them in the
 front yard.

I am a bad girl..I not only bought more yarn. But I also
bought the entire first season of Star Trek Deep Space 9
...for over 50 bucks.
I shouldn't have...
my Mom might need that 50 dollars for a bounced
check or something..or just because she "feels restless"
Which basically means "give me money or I'll sit here and
tell you how depressed I am... capped off with how everyone
abuses me."


No really..I love my Mom.

I do wish she didn't eat 4 times more than
anyone else in the family.

I knitted for Christmas.
I also left my camera batteries and
charger at my sister's house.

In addition to finishing the other mitten for Becca,
I started a pair of cabled fingerless mitts for me.
They're pink!
I'm not using a pattern.
I think I have actually used a pattern...
hmmm
I made "nautie"
That's one reason I don't slam out FO's like other people.
Most things I have a formula for..and they go quick enough.
Other things...alot of swatching. Alot of trial and error.
AFTER alot of sketching.
But the fingerless gloves...that's easy.
I just picked up my tools and let 'er rip.

Yanno....I see all the time on Amazon and
other places where books are reviewed...under
the knitting catagory...
the reviewers feel the need to say.
"This is not a book for beginners." ,
quite often.
It sounds to me like they are saying.
"I know this fact because I myself am an expert."
and
"As an expert I can and will say what books
are suitable for beginners."

I would love to think it's just a case of an
experienced one wanting to steer the innocent
newbie away from the perils of intermediate
writings.
But...
there is rarely a reference to a book that IS good for a
beginner.
And there is generally reference to all that they can do in
one form or another


Now..if that doesn't make you angry...

What is it with yarn snobs!?
What really cracks me up...acrylics that
are acceptable if they are put out by some
"fashionable" company.
What also cracks me up are "fashionable" yarns
that are pure crap!
No..I'm not the world's biggest fan of Red Heart Super Saver.
But...acrylic in general, has it's place.
And people who knit with it...and who knit with Lion's Brand, Red Heart, Paton's, Caron's....STOP LETTING YARN SNOBS MAKE YOU FEEL YOU SHOULD APPOLOGISE!



 

What's with me lately..

I am not the best knitter in the world...but
 lately my work has been really loose and sloppy.
That ribbing is a disgrace...and ...bleh...the whole thing
looks like crap.
I think I will frog it and go down a size or two in needles.
The wool is sooo pretty.
Look at that color!
It is kind of  overly crisp in hand and not very soft...
and the store had one ball.
So I thought it would be great for mittens for Donna.
It doesn't look it, but that's a really tiny mitten.
She almost never can wear store bought ones,
since her hands so so small.
I knit for about a size 3 year old...tried it on her
while she was napping.
One thing I can say....the mitten fits perfectly.





Um..I painted some...



 

Yay...she liked them!

Well....the owner Purrpower on Craftster liked them...
kitty looks like she wishes someone would please
put the lid on the box.


It doesn'y really appear that the other sweater wearers
are any happier but owner is.

More detailed pics below




They DO however like the catnip toys...as Darlene aka "Puurpower" said...maybe a bit too much. ;)


Also well recieved was the clipboard...she said the painting looks like one of her kitties named Appolo.





I'm so happy she likes them. I can be so slow about things...but
I have to take care of the kids first...
and with all the illness, etc...well...plus it's winter knitting time for the family...so...yeah...slow..
I hate it, but try to make up for it by doing as good a job as possible...
She was very sweet and said only two sweaters would be fine..
but she has 4 cats. So..I wanted to make 4 sweaters.
We agreed on 2 for the swap..and two more to follow.
I had about every kind of problem possible at swap time, and
was lucky to be able to send the two sweaters as well as some
mini kitties.
I wanted to be sure to make up for that!
I make up for things by painting...I'm weird, I guess.

because I really like it...

old one of mine

 

21 inches of cat..

( 21 inches from neck to butt..that doesn't include his head!)
So cat is making a leap for my desk 
which is holding my keyboard and my coffee. 

I do this sort of "catch" while he is in midair, and
he sort of convolutes his form into a half circle,
and lands that way...feet splaying at the last moment.
I feel like an ass.

But he has this habit of putting his long frame in the middle
of everything I do.  
When I knit, he lays on it.
When I sew, I have to nudge him out of the
way of the needle...the MACHINE needle.
When I cook, he wants to see everything I am doing.
When I paint, he lays on my painting or pallette..
unless it's oils..he hates those.
But when he wanted my attention AFTER the strange
kitty acrobatics episode, he just sat on the floor
and looked up and purred as loud as possible.

Pictured Above:
Here he is laying in the middle of one of my work areas...yes...
I am messy.
No..I don't really mind it ...much.
No..we don't eat at that table.

boo!

( ghost face painted by me)

Damn I'm tired. Sick kids, halloween, cupcakes made for my daughter's classroom party...that she was too ill to attend.
We pumped her up with meds so she could do a bit of trick or treating.
Maybe it was a poor parental decision, but it broke my heart to think that after marking each day off on the calender all month, talking non stop about how fun it would all be, how much she loves seeing and talking to all the neighbors( beggers night around here has a block party feel to it...it's fantastic.)I just couldn't stand to break HER heart.
She came up with the spooky princess idea all on her own...she elected not to bother with make up...a sensible choice.
Isn't she beautiful? When I look at that face, I see the whole world.


And her sister...the child so pretty that it makes me worry, wearing her poodle hat. I also knitted wrist bands and ankle bands so she would have a "poodle cut"


This is a better view of the hat.( edit...not so better..the pic was cut off, but you should be able to see it by scrolling down to an entry made last week, or just clicking the pic. I ofcourse would prefer you scroll down. ;) )


Anyways...in addition to that stuff, lots of work. Painting and knitting

I made something for myself! A pony tail hat!



I have never in 20 plus years made something for myself.
Then I fell in love with this yarn made by ...Red Heart.
It's called "Rag Doll". Described by them as roving wrapped in a fringed thread.
It is beautiful yarn but was oily and I had to wash it before I knit it so I didn't get hives.
After all that handling, I had to make something for myself. I caved over pretty colors.
Why is it a ponytail hat?
Because I made a hole in the back for my ponytail.
I was extremely pleased by that.

Other details...hmmm

my own pattern, colorway is "Wow", and I used 10 1/2 circular and DPN's.

And last but not least...a couple of painted pumkins!


Whew...alot of pics. Sorry if you are dial up.
Have a great day, night, stardate, whatever.

1000 words...?

I always wondered about this thing...what are the words?

Oh hey...guess what. I have a head that is larger than what is considered average for a man.
Oddly..I always thought I had a small head.
I have a bigger head than Bill....at least in circumference...his is 19 and a half..mr skinny head.
But loooooong. :)
Perhaps I shall study phrenology one day.

I said I would!

And look..I am.
This is a painting that I finally finished today...the recipient..if she sees this ever, will know how over due it is. I am sorry.
It's a Sphinx kitty. Acrylic on clipboard. ( yup..it's useful too!)

I am thinking to post about 3 paintings a week..both old and new. A gradual migration of the old art blog. A mix of painting and knitting..and other stuff..I NEED to do the "other"
It's killing me not to.
See..I also can embroider pretty well,applique, and also paint fabric.

I need a new face

to this blog, that is.
First...I maintain the position that knitting and other textile and needle ...crafts are simply art in a different form.
They are as valid to me as painting.
So...
All the art is going to live together.
I want this to be a compilation of all my thoughts, writing, and whatever else I spit at you.

I have seperated myself from myself for too long.
Maybe I thought that if I put each part in a box, it would get easier to figure out...but it isn't.
I do know one thing..I have let others influence my art too strongly. I have let others tell me what is or isn't art.
I may argue, but I complied in the end.
It's funny. I was praised for color usage. Then I was told that I should be insulted by that.
I was praised for imagination...but when I did realism people seemed skeptical.
So I went on to try and prove my abilities there.
When noone responded, I just didnt know what to do.
I listened to my Mom when she more or less told me I wasn't all that good.
I got upset that I paint in the style that this person or that person paints.
I let other's tastes, skill, and opinions dictate how and what I paint....and knit....and every other creative pursuit.
I have to stop.
No one is going to tell me what, how where, or why anymore.
I dont care if DiVinci himself comes to haunt me and tell me it's wrong.
In fact...the more I think about it..I dont need a new face..
I need MY face.
Anyone that doesn't like it can look elsewhere.

Hmmm..I had a new name for this blog figured out...then I forgot it.
Sigh..I hope it comes back to me because it was really good.

OK...the girls want to go out...I would rather cut my tongue out than go out right now ( or any other time generally speaking).
But you do things for your kids that you dont want to.
You just do.

When you have it figured out..

but still dont do it.

I have suddenly seen everything click into place like a dream.
All the things I have learned to do...the painting, the needlework.
I am supposed to be a textile/mixed media artist of some sort.
But I am quite frankly afraid.
I dont know why.
I have sold my paintings...and from what I have seen, straight painting is harder to sell than fiber art or mixed media.
Collage has exploded in popularity...and has began to be all the same. Some kind of black and white vintage compilation of photos with different body parts combined different ways to make a new human like form...and usually wearing pointy hats. Add some swirls and some flowers and dont forget some meaningful and personal handwritten text.
Voila...you have art that is sooooo unique that you learned how to do it from a book sold at Michaels.
Books about collage, altered books, etc were sadly just coppied instead of being starting points as I believe they were originally intended.
I want to incorporate my art into fiber. I have those I admire.
But I dont want to BE them. I dont want to be someone saying how creative they are when really they're just doing what is the trend.
I panicked when knitting became "in". Only continue to do it because I love it...and I have done it since way before it was the thing...and because like tattoos and peircings...you may see lots on the net, but it isn't really all that rampant in Westerville Ohio.